It's been a very baby-filled fortnight. While grandma has made no secret of the fact that I should have gotten pregnant right from the second I said 'I do', my mother (M) and mother-in-law (MIL) did at least maintain a respectful, if anticipatory, silence the first couple years.

Of late, however, their careful hints and hopeful references to 'my grandchildren' have gradually escalated from 'so your mother-in-law has been asking me when you're going to have kids' (good try, mum, blame it on the other mother), to 'you guys still don't want to have kids ar?!!!' Very unsubtle, I know.

Grandma, on her part, is most pleased that finally, people are starting to see her point about providing her with (more) great-grandchildren. After all, has she not advocated reproduction 'as soon as you can'?

The father (F) and father-in-law (FIL) have wisely kept mum (pun intended) on the subject. While I hear my FIL has casually expressed his intentions - out of my hearing - to educate his grandchildren, I don't think F really wants grandchildren yet. Although perhaps his reaching the big six-oh this year might push him in that direction. It's different for him though, he doesn't feel the pressure. None of my cousins on his side of the family are even married. It could be another five years or more before they get to attend the nuptials of another nephew/niece.

Having said that, I should add that the abovementioned grandma, the M of my M, is exempt from all whinging and irritation expressed here because she's my absolute favourite elderly person in the world, I love her to bits, and she can do no wrong - the vast majority of the time. I should also add that all this baby-talk has not been helped by real baby-talk, thanks to the CNY reunions which has seen the maternal cousins gather... with their cute little tots.

Sure, they're really cute, and I'll even admit to (finally!) wanting one of my own... in the future. But the operative word here is 'in the future', obviously, because babies aren't just something you can go to 1Utama and select from the 'new season' collections. Secretly, it's a relief to discover some maternal yearning. M isn't exactly the hands-on mum type, and I did wonder if I might have inherited the totally undomesticated gene. For sure, I'm a doofus in the kitchen, though I can't say I inherited her ambitious career gene either. Gawd.

The thing is, I wonder whether the folks want us to have kids because they want grandchildren, or they want to be able to tell their friends and relatives that they have grandchildren. There's a very big difference. Especially when sentences almost always start with, 'So-and-so already has...' and 'So-and-so keeps asking me...'

In this aspect, at least I know my grandma is 100% sincere. Because it's not like she has anyone to call up and announce the good news to. I think all these so-and-sos, well-meaning, gossipy or just plain nosy, should not get to pressure the folks and indirectly bug me.

Secondly, the constant nagging really takes the fun out of planning for a family. I'm sure hubby would be a little more open to discussing the subject if everyone was just a little more subtle and open to hearing 'whys' and 'nos'. I almost don't want to get pregnant just because I don't want the credit to go to parental pressure. I want our planning to be ours, and I want the decision to be ours, and it's a little hard for that now when everyone keeps preaching insemination. It's probably one of the most annoying side effects.

Thirdly, and I confess this is really personal and judgmental, I hate it when M says 'don't worry, you have so many people waiting to take care of your baby for you', and uses that as a reason to have kids. When MIL says that, it's an offer of help because she really is waiting to play grandmother. But when M says that, it annoys me. I know I'm being horribly biased, and we're always harsher towards our own parents, but what is the point of having kids if you don't intend to take care of them? It's almost like, in an exaggerated sense, deliberately having kids for the sake of appeasing the masses, and then packing the child off because your part is done. I'm a latch-key kid, can you tell?

Nevertheless, these are just thoughts and rantings, a culmination of almost non-stop baby-talk and an increasing awareness of my maternal instincts and advancing years. I don't think I'm in any way old, but I guess I always wanted to be a hot young mama.

I'm also pregnant.

Just kidding.

No, really, I'm not. But (no?) thanks to one and all, Y and I have been talking about it. We probably should too, before our parents adopt grandchildren.